“Never let go of that fiery sadness called desire.” ~ Patti Smith
In my pursuit to writing content for my blog, I’ve spent most of my bus rides to work googling “life as a 24 year old”. It was difficult to find a blogger who was 24 years old and was blogging more about life than style.
I started this blog around 4 months ago and since then it has under gone some major changes. Why? Because I don’t know what the hell I want from it. Actually I do but I don’t know what to do to get it. Kind of like my life right now.
Most of the articles I’ve read about quarter life crisis have given me the impression that those who are my age are worried about their career and in rocky relationships. I’m in neither of those positions. I’m 24 (25 in 4 months), with a good job and in a very happy relationship. So why do I feel like I’m going through a QLC?
Perhaps my issue isn’t my situation, maybe my issue is just me. I’m not happy with myself. I’m impatient with myself and I’m so focused on the destination that I forget about the journey and how unprepared I am for it.
I read somewhere that part of the QLC is being incredibly ambitious but painfully indecisive. Sometimes this overly ambitious and indecisive mentality is fuelled by comparison. Comparison is the thief of joy.
I spend a lot of time watching YouTubers living their lives. Travelling, wearing nice clothes, getting married, buying houses etc. I say to myself “I wish I had that”. But I’ve learned to remind myself that they are not where I am and I am not where they are.
Watching them live their lives doesn’t mean I should question mine or feel pressure to live up to theirs. Social media only shows you the highlights of peoples lives and very little about their struggle to get there.
This need to compare often leads me to forget that I have a few of my own highlight moments. I need to remind myself of that more. I need to remind myself I haven’t peeked at my potential. My best if yet to come, I just have to be patient and put in the work to get it.
I guess my issue isn’t that I’m not in a stable place in my quarter life. My issue is that I’m ready for the next level and that’s OK. It’s called desire. So I’ll use this time to not only desire but prepare for whatever it is I want (career, house, marriage, kids etc).
Expressing my anxiety and eagerness on this blog is a good place to start. In fact, it took me a while to understand the difference between living life and living the life that you want – one simply requires breathing and the other requires more intentional efforts.
I’d like to believe that whatever I’m feeling now is all part of the my unique QLC. Something I have to go through to be who I’m destined to be.
I’m excited to see where it leads me.
Have you had a QLC? What were your worries and how did you deal with them?
Let me know in the comments below, get in touch or tweet me @lydiaonlife.