Why You Should Take A Social Media Detox

“Distracted from distraction by distraction” – T.S. Eliot.

We all have a love hate relationship with social media, right? One minute it’s the best thing since sliced bread, the next it’s the biggest pain in the butt. As useful as social media can be in our everyday life, it can soon turn into something negative if used in an unhealthy way. When it does, it’s time for a detox.

“Distracted from distraction by distraction”
T.S. Eliot

We all have a love hate relationship with social media, right? One minute it’s the best thing since sliced bread, the next it’s the biggest pain in the butt. As useful as social media can be in our everyday life, it can soon turn into something negative if used in an unhealthy way.

For me, social media went from something fun I used every now and then to a part of my everyday life. Whenever I was in between tasks, or even tabs, my brain would say “What’s happening on Snapchat?” or “Has anyone followed me on Instagram?”. The truth is, the platforms weren’t the problem; I was. I allowed social media to become my default brain space and control how I perceived my life

Social media can make you focus more on what you portray to be real instead of what is real.

You have Snapchat, right? Don’t you just love how the flower head band filter covers your unlaid lace frontal or how the hearts filter makes your skin smooth and changes the colour of your eyes. None of those things are real yet somehow I feel more confident taking pictures with those filters than I do without. Snapchat and other social media allowed me to present a filtered version of me.

I preferred that version of me over the real me. Granted, the Snapchat filters are entertaining to use but if I’m being honest with myself I was using them as a way to gloss up my reality. To give the illusion that things were “perfect”. That I was “perfect”. But I’m not. My skin breaks out sometimes, I have a few acne marks, my eyebrows are barely there and my wig isn’t always laid. That’s normal. That’s real life. Feeling confident in spite of your flaws is much more important than pretending you have none.

Social media can make you more worried about what other people think of you than what you think of myself.

With Instagram, I always felt like I lived a double life. I had one account for the old me, the one my friends and family knew about, and another account for the new me. The Lydia that was on a journey of self discovery and documenting it on this blog for others to be encouraged. I was happy for the rest of the world to see this new me but not my friends and family. Why? Because I wasn’t quite sure what they would think of this new journey I were on. Would it make sense to them? Would they approve or think I’m silly?

With two taps on my phone, I could be the old Lydia one minute and the new Lydia the next. I had nothing to hide but for some reason I felt the need to. I was afraid of being judged for my attempt at evolving. But that’s what Instagram is about, right? What other people think. If you are not confident in who you are then being in that kind of environment isn’t healthy. We need to find validation in ourselves first before seeking it from others.

Social media makes you spend more time watching someone else fulfil their dreams instead of working on yours.

YouTube, don’t you just love it? It’s the go to place for practically anything.
From movies and music videos, to DIY’s, reviews and hair tutorials. YouTube is amazing but it can also be one of the biggest distractions. At least for me it was.
From the channels I was subscribed to, to the videos I searched for or recently watched. Everything I saw or that was suggested to me was curated for my particular interest – and my particular distraction. YouTube knew what types of videos would keep me watching based on my history and I fell for it every time. I wasted time watching other people live their lives instead of working on mine.


Social media should be there to serve you, your needs and your growth. When you start to feel like it’s taking away from you more than it’s giving to you, its time to leave it alone. So I did. I logged out of YouTube and deleted my Snapchat and Instagram as part of my new year resolution.

Our time and energy is too precious to be wasted on things that don’t contribute positively to our everyday life – both online and offline. Worry about missing out on what other people are doing can lead us to miss out on ourself.

If you plan to take a social media detox I encourage you to use this new found time wisely and revaluate your presence on the internet. Are you being true to yourself?

Till next time.

Love always,
Lydia x

10 YouTubers That Changed My Hair Journey

Whoopi Goldberg looked like me, she had hair like mine. I’d been starved for images of myself.” – Lupita Nyong’o.
I’ve been natural for about 10 years now and it’s only in the last 3, I have really started to understand and…

“Whoopi Goldberg looked like me, she had hair like mine. I’d been starved for images of myself.” – Lupita Nyong’o


Welcome to Lydia on Life

The decision to stop chemically straightening my hair was basically made for me when I was in secondary school. My mum was tired of the process and I was tired of managing the constant changing textures. Within 3 weeks of perming my hair the regrowth would come back so soon we struggled to keep up with the frizz. Despite my hair being thick enough to handle the chemicals, my mum knew if we continued it would eventually damage my hair. Nobody wants that! So in year 9 (age 14) my mum decided to stop with the perming and start with the learning.

Lucky for me I grew up around people who could help me maintain my hair despite not understanding how to take care of my natural hair. From random hair sessions in the playground and after school to weekends spent at an aunt’s house or the hair dressers. I did what I could to maintain my 4C thick and curly hair. After a few years of getting my hair done by someone else I decided to learn the trade for myself. Saving some money and gaining more knowledge on my hair didn’t sound like a bad idea to me.

Thank God for YouTube! I could kiss Chad Hurley, Steve Chen and Jawed Karim right now.

Watching video after video and practising on myself and anyone that would let me, I learned how to do basic styles and tailored them to my liking. Natural hair is a mystery to a lot of people and I’ll admit it takes a long time to truly understand it. It’s kinky but soft, its oily yet coarse, you can have more than one texture and don’t get me started on the shrinkage!

I’ve been natural for about 10 years now and it’s only in the last 3, I have really started to understand and appreciate my natural hair. I love rocking my natural hair but it’s taken a lot of self-confidence to allow me to ignore certain views society has on black natural hair. I’ve had my fill of comments like “your hair is huge” (am I rocking a bush on my head?)  or my personal favourite; touching my hair whilst asking “can I touch it?” (am I a pooddle?)

I get a lot of these comments (at work and other places) but as a black woman you kind of get to these comments. I choose to take them as compliments despite how uncomfortable I may feel at times.

We go through a lot of challenges as women whose naturally frizzy hair may not necessarily fit society’s standards of beauty. I could talk about that for ages but we’ll save that debate for another post. It’s not an easy thing to deal with, but it’s worth dealing with it if your natural hair is what you want. Kinks and all!

If you are going to embark on this journey (and trust me, it’s a journey) you will need a little help and a lot of inspiration along the way. I know I did!

So I thought I’d share with you some of the YouTubers who have helped me and are still helping me along my journey.

Here we go!

Isimeme Edeko


YouTube: Halfafrican Beaute
Twitter: @halfricanbeaute
Instagram: @halfricanbeaute

April Bee

YouTube: April Bee
Twitter: @aprilbeee_
Instagram: @aprilbeee_


YouTube: MsDanti1
Instagram: @msdanti


YouTube: TheChicNatural
Instagram: @thechicnatural

Janaé Mason

YouTube: Janae Mason
Instagram: @nae2curly


YouTube: SimplYounique
Intagram: @1simplyounique

Anneka Mclean

YouTube: Lovelyanneka
Instagram: @lovelyanneka

Shantania Beckford

YouTube: Shantania Beckford
Twitter: @ShantaniaBeckfd
Instagram: @shantania_beckford


YouTube: OnlyOneJess
Instagram: @onlyonejess_

Chiaka Valentina

YouTube: ChiakaValentina
Twitter: @chiakavalentina
Instagram: @chiakavalentina

What I gained from these beautiful and talented women was the knowledge to maintain my hair but i had to tailor what the information they provided to suit my specific type of hair. For example a lot of the products they incorporated into their routine weren’t necessary for my hair (or I couldn’t find them in the UK) so I had to find alternatives. This took some trial and error but it was worth it because  I managed to grow my hair whilst keeping it healthy.

I did that by listening to my own hair – what it liked, what it didn’t like and how much attention it needed. You’ll be surprised how much your hair cooperates when it gets what it wants. Aren’t we all like that anyway?

Every hair is different and what works for one person may not work for another, but it’s worth trying, right? What you learn from trying is knowledge that will be useful to you and someone else.

One of my goals for 2017 was to reach bra strap length hair and in June 2017 I achieved that. You can too if you take the time to learn how. Hopefully once I get used to this blogging thing I’ll share some of the products I use and routines that have helped me so far. There are people out there with far much longer and thicker hair than me but that’s their hair and this is mine. They shared their story and I’ve learned from them so why not share mine.

I hope this has been helpful to you in some way and be sure to check these ladies out.

Till next time!

Your Turn…

Have you been on a hair journey? What have you learned?

Share your experiences, questions and tips with everybody in the comments below or get in touch with me via…

Twitter: @lydiaonlife
Instagram: @lydiaonlife
Email: lydiaonlife@gmail.com

If you have your own favourite natural hair YouTubers or websites, please feel free to share them too. I’m also on the hunt for a good natural hair salon in London so please let me know if you have any recommendations.


Lydia x